The day Xeloda finally failed....

Well we got really crappy news last Monday. Lung tumors doubled in size since the last scan 2 months ago. . So after 2 years 3 months of just xeloda, Eric will will be adding biweekly oxali infusions.

This is a major blow. His cancer is no longer controlled and managed.
Instead of folfox, he is sticking with xeloda and adding the oxali. Mostly because he hates being accessed for 3 days. But it's essentially the same thing. The KRas mutation obviously complicates things now. It really limits the amount of treatments he can get before his options run out. They were going to put him on the CPT11 and oxali combo but she has decided to hold that in reserve for when she really needs it. She also said lung surgery will happen soon, she is just waiting for a particular doc that is coming back to mskcc.

Eric is having a really really hard time with this treatment. I think being on xeloda, with all ts manageable side effects, spoiled him a little. Sure he got sick, but he clearly forgot just how ad the oxali is. He is sick. Very sick. barely eating, always sleeping when he gets the chance. E says it feels like he has been hit by a MAC Truck. Just a horrible constant nausea and weakness. And this was only the first round...it doesn't get any better. This is his off week, so hopefully he rebounds before treatment next monday. Pretty much this entire weekend was spent in bed with a bucket next to him. And the other horrible side effects of the oxali are the neuropathy in the hands and feet, and the inability to touch/tolerate cold. Even the slightest chill in a beverage feels like glass shards going down his throat. ITs going to make summer so much fun...insert sarcasm here.

We found a local oncologist out of Doylestown Hospital that we will be using for some of the infusion visits. Since they are biweekly now, going up to NYC every other Monday would just be ridiculous. We are moving to North Wales next month, and Doylestown will be super close. I have a family member that goes to this oncologist, Dr. Lorraine Dougherty, and I have heard very good things about her. Hopefully she is a good match.

I guess that's it. Nothing much more to say. The whole thing just stinks! Below is a pic from infusion last Monday, at least he is staying positive despite the tremendous disappointment.

Falling into a new "normal"

Well I haven't updated too much. There have been some changes but I felt like there wasn't too much to report. Eric had some tumors removed from his liver in early February. He got through the procedure with flying colors.

Skin breakdown and infections are still a major concern. He was diagnosed with another nasty staph a few weeks ago. As a result he had to go on a mega dose of antibiotics for 25 days. We are having such a hard time keeping ahead of the infections! It seems as soon as one is cleared a new, different, form of staph pops up. He has not gotten MRSA since the summer, but my concern is that every time he gets a new staph it is resistant to more and more drugs. Our fear is always MRSA, as he went septic from it years before his cancer dx, and is very prone to relapses. We also now continue to worry about c-diff from all the antibiotics he is constantly on.

The team has decided to continue with the same Xeloda dosage and frequency for now. 2500 mg 2 x per day biweekly. Although I question the effectiveness of the drug now that mets have continued to form, Kemeny seems confident that it is keeping most of the disease at bay. She says if the meds were not working, we would see much more progressive growth, not the mets popping up that we see now. As long as Eric is still up for surgery, that is the route that we will continue to take. He fears having to go back to systemic chemo (IV), and mentally is much better with the Xeloda. However, recently, we believe exasperated by the cold, Eric has experienced crippling joint pain. Some days he can barely walk. Watching him this weekend was horrible. Sunday he looked like an 80 year old man. It has always made him achy, but now it is really effecting him. We are going to talk to Kemeny on the 18th of March and discuss this. Maybe there is an anti-inflamatory they can give him.

PET and CT scans are on Thursday. Eric's mother is going to go up with him. We will get the results on Monday and find out if there is any new cancer growth since the last scans in Jan and the surgery in Feb. We also meet with Dr. Sophocleaus, the IR surgeon, for follow up.

Eric has also begun light therapy. What looks like a stand up tanning bed was delivered to our home and is set up in the bedroom. The hopes are that daily exposure will help with Eric's skin breakdown and infections. And heck, maybe I will get a nice even tan before bathing suit season :)

As always, your prayers and support and very much appreciated. The past few months have been so hard as I have watched so many of my friends say goodbye to their loved ones, namely husbands, to this horrible disease. I feel like it has taken over our entire lives. Much like history, we now have our own way to describe our history, BC and AD, Before Cancer, and After Diagnosis. Every day we learn something new about ourselves and each other. I am happy to say that finally we are able to really talk. Talk about fears, talk about future, talk about the unknowns and what is going on in the now. For those of you that know me personally, this is a huge thing that took 2 years to happen. A very long 2 years. I think we have finally evolved into a real couple fighting this disease together.

On a bright note Eric celebrated his "37th year on this Earth/19 Months Past The Expiration Date" with a nice little gathering at Maggies on Jan 27th. Thank you to all the friends that made it out that day to help him celebrate. I celebrated my 32nd birthday, and was so very grateful that Eric felt well enough to celebrate with me. We also celebrated the beginning of our 9th year together. Hard to believe we have been together that long. We were babies when we met. Its insane. And finally, thank God, Eric was feeling well enough to attend his son Mark's high school ring ceremony. I know that was a very special day for them both, and Eric could not be prouder of what a fine young man Mark is growing up to be. Especially considering his entire high school experience his father has been sick. Despite that, Mark has done so well. We are both very proud of him, and very grateful that his mother Amy has done a fine job raising him.

Well I guess that's all for now. I am sure I will update when we get the scan results. Keep up the prayers if you don't mind, they are clearly working, even if we don't always see it.

Peace and Love,
Jeaneane

glad christmas is over

This one was a tough one. Ever since we got the scan results before Thanksgiving I tried to have holiday cheer, mainly for the sake of my son, and partially for the sake of my own sanity. Even though previous Christmases have been cancer filled, this one just got to me more.

Eric really hadn't been out of bed much in over 2 weeks. All weekends were spent in bed...evenings from late afternoon on were spent in bed. The whole holiday was spent in bed. It was so sad. And he felt so horrible and worn.

I ended up delivering the presents to his son. Eric had wanted to do it but he was too worn. I called my mother in law to wish her a Merry Christmas. It was heartbreaking. Eric didn't even have the stamina to speak with her Christmas morning. He was able to open some gifts in bed Christmas morning. I made sure I snapped a shot of it, even though he got mad. I wanted a picture. I wanted something from this holiday.

Logan and I went to church together. It was so depressing looking around and seeing all the happy and HEALTHY families around us. Ok, maybe not everyone is healthy or happy, but they were well enough to make it to Christmas Mass with smiles on their faces rather then laying in bed in pain and exhausted. After communion, the whole church began singing "Silent Night". That's when I lost it. I started weeping silently in my pew and couldn't stop. People around me were staring and probably thinking I was insane. Luckily Logan didn't seem to notice. In a church full of people singing about the birth of our Lord, I had never felt more sad and alone. I prayed to God to help me, to give me strength. I prayed for strength for Eric. I didn't pray for him to be healthy. I know God already has his plan. Good or bad, I don't know, but he has already decided.  I just prayed for the strength to understand and accept his plan. I prayed for strength for Eric to continue to fight. Whether he is fighting for his cure, or fighting to stay with us as long as possible, I want him to continue to be whole. 

He never made it to Christmas Dinner. Thanks to some generous souls at The Breathing Room Foundation, I had a nice frozen meal I got ready for him. Logan and I went to my parents first for some gift giving then Aunt and Uncle's for dinner to spend time with the Conklins. I felt guilty for leaving him, but knew I needed to keep some sense of normalcy for my 12 year old. But overall, this Christmas was just rotten.

Well here is to a better 2013. Because 2012 was rotten too, and so was 2011, and the last part of 2010. 2 years and 3 months straight is a really long time to be fighting this horrible disease without any sort of break. That's a really long time to be sick every day. Hopefully 2013 gives Eric a break, and us a chance to reboot.

PET Scan and CT Scan first week in Jan. We find out the results Jan 14th. If cancer growth is reduced or stabilized we are happy. If cancer has grown or spread, then we reach our first official chemo fail, and 5FU and Xeloda will no longer be a treatment option. Remember there are only about 4 different drug options for Metastatic Colon Cancer, so a drug fail super sucks.

Thanks for all the prayers. We really need them.

I got lazy...

Here are some back dated posts from Eric's carepage. I put them in chronological order. Then I will do an update today. I suck.

A chance to breathe...

Posted Sep 14, 2012 2:54pm

We finally got some good news this week. We got the results back from Eric's PET Scans, and they were clear, showing no disease present. This is incredible news, and I guess in some way a shock.
Eric is to continue on chemo for an indefinite amount of time. This is an offensive measure. From the beginning we were told that even when all tumors were removed, Eric would have approx 6 months of chemo to be sure they killed off all the disease.

The CEA level dropped from 10.2 to 8 in a month. We are hoping it continues to drop. The CEA marks the presence of disease. Once we start seeing numbers below 4 we know this is going well.
So I guess we begin the road to remission. Don't know if I would clinically say Eric is there yet, but it sure is a weight lifted off of his shoulders knowing that they do not see any disease.
However, since he will be continuing on chemo, he will still have the fatigue and million other side effects it causes. Fingers crossed this journey is almost over, even if just for a little while.
Thank you for your love, support, and prayers. As always, BELIEVE.

nervous as hell

Posted Nov 13, 2012 8:34pm

Tomorrow Eric goes for another round of PET and CT scans. I'm a wreck, so is he. The September ones were clear, so these results could be life changing. These results may be able to tell us whether or not Eric is finally ahead of this disease after 25.5 months of chasing it. If these scans are clear then he may be able to stop chemo. If he stops and his scans in 3 months stay clear then he begins remission.

But there is always a chance the scans wont be clear. Since he is on chemo and the last scans showed no presence of cancer, if these next ones do, then the chemo is considered a failure and we have to try something new. There are only about 5 types of chemo Eric can use successfully, we can't afford a failure, and quite frankly, he deserves a break.

So tonight I am saying my prayers and hoping the scans are good. We will not get the results until Monday, so its going to be a long 5 days and Eric is going to be a freaking basketcase. So any kind words you can send his way would be great. Help get his mind off things. And if the news isn't good in Monday, well we will fight on like we have since the beginning.

And as for me, ill keep it together and put on my brave face like I always do. Some day ill have my meltdown ...just can't have it yet ;-)

Silver Linings Playbook

Posted Dec 2, 2012 2:29pm

I feel like we are forever looking for the silver linings. Don' get me wrong, I am not complaining, but the ups and downs really start to take their toll.

As we are well immersed in our 3rd holiday season since Eric's diagnosis, all around me I can find things to be grateful for. Loving family, true friends, wonderful jobs and coworkers, and Eric being here to spend another holiday with us. We are lucky, many people don't get to live to see another Christmas, let alone 3, after a diagnosis like his. But the length of this battle is taking its toll physically, emotionally, spiritually, and any other "ly" you can think of.

I wasn't going to share this information, as I wasn't sure how much Eric wanted people to know. But we told our families, and Eric said it on facebook, so I figured I would let the other people who have supported him since day 1 know. The PET scan results we received right before Thanksgiving were not good. They weren't horrible, but they weren't good.

If you recall Eric's scans in September showed no disease, but to be offensive they kept him on chemo. It seemed that the last of the cancer that the docs had been chasing for 2 years was finally gone. Sadly, this November scan showed disease in the liver. New disease. Disease that grew while he was on chemo. Its a small amount, but it is there, and it is very disheartening. The liver had been cancer free for a year. This is a bad blow. Also CEA tumor marker went from 6.8 to 9 in a month, indicating cancer growth.

This stinks, and Eric was pretty upset (as I was), but he is taking it with stride now. They decided to keep him on the same dosage of the same chemo until the next PET scan in Jan. I think they are trying to get him through the holidays comfortably. This regimen has been , by far, the easiest for him in terms of side effects and mental toll. Kemeney already has a game plan I am sure. If there is more growth in the next scan he will prob be put back on the big guns, and life will really suck. The big stuff is terrible. It turns Eric into a real "sick person".

So this holiday season, please remember whats important. I know I am. Laugh a little more, smile a little wider, hug a little tighter, and say I love you to those who you do...you just never know what tomorrow will hold.
Peace & Love,
Jeaneane

Eric's Cancer Fight Countdown: 790 days of fighting and living since being told he was going to die.

Keeping up with the Komplications

Eric started xeloda again 4 weeks ago. Last monday was the beginning of the 2nd round in this cycle. So far he seems to be doing ok with it. Today is his last day of chemp before his weeklong break. We had our 2nd appointment with the derm on monday, as his skin is still breaking down something awful. They are going to try another form of ointment which eric used awhile ago. They are also going to keep him on a constant low dose of antibiotic (doxycycline)to try to ward off infections, but we need to be leery of him getting c-diff again. His cultures have come up positive for Staph, and acinetobacter. So it is obvious the need for antibiotics is there, or he is going to end up in the hospital again. Then I get a phone call from derm on tuesday saying Eric tested positive for a different staph strain, but so far not showing as MRSA. But this staph is resistant to the doxycycline. So after a few days on that he had to stop, and use hibiclensse bath and an ointment until we meet with infectious disease in 2 weeks. Grrrrrr!!!

Dr. Locatoure, the derm, wanted to treat Eric with an additional chemo called Methotrexate solely for the purpose of trying to control the skin breakdown. Methotrexate is used for some forms of breast cancer and leukemia, but it can be used off label for chemical abortions and autoimmune disorder, like Eric's eczema. It can have adverse effects on the liver, which Eric only has 1/3 of. As a result, for right now, Oz (Dr. Kemeny), nixed it. In a way it sucks, because Methotrexate is really a great way to treat the skin breakdown but she does not want to interfere with the effectiveness of his chemo for the colon cancer mets. Its frustrating, but I am sure there is some wisdom to it.

Other than that we continue to take things one day at a time. There are bad days, and then some not so bad days. The good days are few and far between anymore. But every once in a while there are some good days thrown in there. The neuropathy is getting intense at times, as he is showing symptoms from chemos past. The worst thing is the trunk neuropathy, where several times, well honestly almost constantly, he feels like he is being stung by thousands of bees on his entire trunk region. We are hoping that as the skin recovers, this will go away as well. It is not a common side effect to any of the chemos that he is on, so they believe it is either a side effect of his his most recent surgeries (some sort of nerve damage), or the result of the trauma to his skin. We are obviously hoping this is temporary and not permanent, as it causes Eric a great deal of pain.

So far we have no other appointments until September. The first week in September Eric will have a PET scan and a CT scan. The following week he will review the results with the docs. By that point he will have had 2.5 rounds of xeloda in his system post surgery. We pray that there will be no signs of disease. Until then, as long as there are no changes, I probably won't have anything to update.

When you try your best, but you don't succeed. When you get what you want, but not what you need...

When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down on your face
When you lose something you cannot replace
Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Tears stream down on your face
I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down on your face
And I...

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

Chemo resumes today. Xeloda at a lower dosage then before to see if Eric gets toxicity again. He doesn't want to be on IV chemo, so we are hoping a lower dosage works. CEA level has increased from 9.8 a month ago to 10.2, despite the tumors in the lungs being removed. So clearly there is still cancer in his body. Pretty bummed.

We got into a fight the other day. He was yelling and screaming that he doesn't care anymore. So I gave it right back to him. I told him to give up then, stop fighting, stop letting so many people waste their time and energy supporting a person who doesn't care anymore. I got so mad and told him in frustration to stop all the treatments then, stop going to NY, stop taking up space and time someone who wants to live would be happy to get. I asked him why would he continue to have surgery after surgery and chemo and all the other nonsense if he didn't care anymore? his response-Because he felt like it. Then I called him out on it.  I told him that when you really don't care you stop saying anything at all. I forced him to hear me say that I know that he does care, and that he is scared to die. I told him anything you love is worth fighting for, and no matter how mad I made him (and boy did I make him mad), I was still going to fight for him, even if he wasn't going to fight for himself. I know he cares. But I know he is frustrated. The confirmation today of resuming chemo was just another blow. 

I'll keep pushing him. I swear to this. No matter how much he may hate me, I will push him. I WILL NOT let him give up. He has too much to fight for. He is tired and broken. But no matter what Eric, I promise,  I will try to fix you...

Scans, Scans, Scans...

E had a PET Scan yesterday at Sloan. Afterward he had treatment, but did not meet with the doctor. On March 2nd he will have a CT Scan, which was scheduled before the PET Scan was. We will not find out the results for either scan until our March 5th appointment. This also happens to be my 31st birthday, so I am hoping for the gift of improving health and clear scans.

As always, we ask that you continue to keep E and other cancer warriors in your prayers. We are praying to Catherine McAuley, foundress of the Sisters of Mercy, for Eric's miracle. She has been declared Venerable for all her works, and is well on her way to sainthood. Our hope is that Eric's miracle can be a result of her divine intercession.

O beloved Catherine,
through the power of my
most compassionate Lord
and Saviour, Jesus Christ,
I humbly beseech you to
look with love and pity on
Eric who is ill at this time.
Stir up in me the same
passion that impelled you
to respond to the needs of
your time.

Bless me with the sure
knowledge of your
presence and with a
complete trust in your
providence.

Use once again your spirit
of compassion and your
ardent desire to Alleviate
suffering and to restore
Eric to full health, if it is
God’s holy will.

I ask this in the name of
Jesus who lives and reigns
with the Father in unity
with the Holy Spirit.

Amen

short but sweet

All visible tumors now gone. Doesn't guarantee cancer is gone, but nothing can be seen by the naked eye. Tumor growth burned, as was cells surrounding tumor growth area in liver. Continue receiving 5FU chemotherapy. Meet with oncologist next Monday to discuss if any changes will be made to treatment. Will also review the results of PET scan that was performed.

E did well with the procedure and was able to go home that night.

texting away after waking up.

Thank you for your continued support and prayers.

Just as an FYI- I am not really using facebook much anymore. At least not for posting updates. I limited what people can see as well. So I will continue to use this, as well as the blog for updates. I also went to on a deleting frenzy. Please do not take it personally if you were deleted. Because of some privacy concerns I basically limited my account to close friends and family. Sorry if I offended anyone, although I am sure facebook doesn't really bother many of you.

WTF??!!

That's basically the only words I have right now. Since the proper family members have been informed, I now felt it was ok to tell everyone else that Eric's cancer is back. Last month was the 1 year anniversary of his cancer diagnosis. He celebrated this milestone by getting a tattoo (if you know Eric you would understand why). He explains the symbolism of the tat as, "The worst day of my life, and the people who saved me."

Well now, a month later, and 7 months cancer free, they found tumor growth in his liver. Again I say, WTF?! This guy can't catch a break. He finally felt like his life was beginning to become normal again, and he gets rocked with this. But I am so proud of how well he is handling it, and how he continues to fight on. But I still think he and I are both warranted a little "WTF".

So the fight continues. It feels like deja vu in a way. The beginning of the school year, new school, new job, new friends in our lives. And then cancer comes and invades our world.

There are only a few requests I have right now, and they are sincere. 1.) Please continue to pray for Eric's health and strength. (And if you wouldn't mind a few extra prayers for the rest of his family that would be great too).

2.) We need our friends and family, and we need our lives to have the least amount of drama as possible. That means, I need to make amends. I am asking for forgiveness from some, and it would make Eric and mine, and our children's lives much easier if we can forgive and move on. Anger is a poison that does NOTHING to help fight.

3.) I need help. I can't do this alone again. Pride aside, I will take people up on offers to help. If your off on a Monday, and can take Eric to NY for an appointment, I need you. If you have kids that Logan could play with and wouldn't mind another kid hanging out, I need you. There are so many other things I could put, but the bottom line is that I need my family and friends to fight help Eric in his fight. Last year, mostly by choice, I did it all by myself. I nearly cracked. i wouldn't let anyone help me, it was a huge mistake. This year I will not do it. If you can help, let me know.



Eric is continuing to go to work. He even went in to teach the recruits with his fanny pack on. In that fanny pack was the chemo pumping into his port to keep him alive. Sure he felt like shit. Hell the day before he was told his cancer was back. But he went because he wanted to. Because he wants to still be Eric.

I am going to try to continue to work as much as possible. I want to save the time in case I really need it. Eric will be having upcoming surgery soon (or so it seems) to remove the tumor growth. I would need to take off for that, so any appointments, I am trying to see if people wouldn't mind taking him up to NYC. (I will provide the car/gas/tolls I just need peoples time). These appointments are Mondays. Eric says he can take himself if I can't go, but I would rather someone go with him, in case he has a negative reaction from the chemo.

Well I will summarize what's going on medically:
09/16/11- 6 months cancer free
10/4/11- 1 year anniversary of Stage IV diagnosis
10/31/11- 7 month CT Scan
11/7/11- Results of Scan
11/7/11- Hear the dreaded words, "We found cancer." CEA LEVEL: 7.1
11/7/11- Treatment begins at 6:30pm. Eric is given a different type of chemo, 5FU.


A little about 5FU: It's the oldest chemo there is for fighting colon cancer. Not that its any less effective. It runs for a period of 48 hours, hence the fanny pack. It's used to treats lots of other cancers too. It's a good drug, and has many less side effects then the drug combo Eric was on before. Eric was previously taking "the big guns". They dont want to use that combo again unless they need to. That was a 3 chemo cocktail of FUDR, oxaliplatin, and irinotican. A nasty strong combo. But the doc's feel they can give his the 5FU and shrink the tumor growth. If more tumors were to be found in different areas, then the big guns would come out.

Starting Chemo Again....
Rocking his killer fanny pack...

Some good and some meh

Good: 21st will be eric's last chemo for 7 weeks. Kemeny wants to stop 3 weeks before surgery, and he won't have chemo for 4 weeks after.

Good: she also said he won't have much chemo after surgery. It would just be a precaution. Maybe 2 rounds in may-june.

Good: she was smiling and happy with how well Eric is doing. If you know Kemmeny, you know this is a big deal.


Meh: eric's bloodwork wasn't ideal today, so he isn't getting chemo. He has to get bloodwork done next monday in Philly to make sure he's good for the 21st. She's not too concerned because she thinks bloodlevels are whacked beccause of PVE last monday.

MEh: the 21st in now going to be a NY day, and its during PSSA's. That is going to go over real well at worlk. About as well as a fart in church.

Meh: I have never seen Eric so tired before in my life. It really sucks.

A personal glimpse into the life of a cancer patient.

Ok so may it is not quite a glimpse, but today I feel the closest I probably ever will to feeling 1/3 of what Eric feels like on a daily basis. I have been stricken with the dreaded stomach virus that is making its rounds with all my friends and family. Logan had it for a day, only puked 4 times and felt better by 4pm the same day. Just to be on the safe side I had quarantined him at my parents house so Eric wouldn't get sick. That was a few weeks ago. But alas, it seems that I finally got hit with this monster. I looked like this poor little girl all day today. Not nearly as cute, and basically laying on the bathroom room floor. I feel even worse now, but moved to the couch and just run to the bathroom every 5 minutes. This sucks. And I only see it getting worse as the day progresses.

Now I know how Eric feels. He probably feels even worse then this. For almost 2 weeks he feels like shit. Feels nausea and stomach pains that leave him miserable and so worn out. When asked how his day is, he usually responds "tastes like shit". Now I know what that means.

Previously, the best way I could have described the chemo effects is a long lasting hangover. You know the ones were all you want to do is stick your finger down your throat to make it go away?? Yea those kind. But now after less then 24 hours of being tormented with the stomach bug, I can empathize at a totally new level. Now I understand why he doesn't want to go out and just wants to go to sleep. I feel it too right now, and I knew mine will pass in a few days, where Eric has until June to fell like shit, with every treatment feeling worse.

Needless to say I am staying away from Eric. I am staying away from everyone. If what my friends have told me is true, this horrible thing lasts several days to clear from your system. UGH!!!!!! I CANT BE SICK!! I need to take care of my family. GRRRRRR!!!!

Eric's mother Kathy, and her friends and family, are holding a benefit this weekend for Eric. The Beef & Beer for Officer Eric Dial~Our Cancer Warrior is being held this Saturday at Turner's in Roxborough from 7-11. There will be excellent food, baskets, and dancing with music being provided by PJ the DJ. It is really kind of them to do this for Eric. A lot of hard work was put into the event, and we thank everyone who attends.

Eric will be heading up to NY this weekend to prepare for Monday's Portal Vein Embolization. To prepare for this he has gone into an isolation. No going out, no crowds, pretty much staying in the house. It's a tough thing to do when you are used to being active, but the doctor ordered it. According to the oncologist, "If you want to continue to be my patient, then you will follow my rules." I guess it hasn't been so hard this week because he is so sick from chemo, but now, as he prepares for this major procedure Monday, and his upcoming liver resection, he needs to follow her rules.

Monday's procedure is an interesting one. The are basically going to shutdown the right side of the liver by cutting blood flow in the artery. If you guys remember from previous posts, the right side of his liver still has all the tumors. With the first part of his liver resection in November, Dr. D'Angelica was able to remove all the cancer from the left side. Anyway, when the cut off blood flow this will cause the right side to start to shrink, essentially "killing off" some of the tumors in the process. While this is happening, the left side of the liver will be forced to regenerate (grow back) at a faster rate. This will give Eric the largest liver section possible when liver resection surgery occurs. Hopefully the resection will be in 6-8 weeks, maybe around Easter time. When we met with Dr. Lee on Monday for chemo he was ecstatic over the latest CT results. He has been so supportive of us, and carries out Dr. Kemeny's medical plan perfectly. It's also nice because we get a little more one on one attention from Dr. Lee because he has the time Dr. Kemeny does not have.

So all in all, we are still fighting the good fight. We keep our faith and sense of humor. Eric keeps pushing the bar because he knows he will beat this. Only a few more months and all of this will just be another obstacle that we overcame. Here's to laughter, love, faith, and courage!

Well its been building up inside of me, For oh I don't know how long....

I don't know why
But I keep thinking
Something's bound to go wrong

But she looks in my eyes
And makes me realize
And she says "Don't worry baby"
Don't worry baby
Don't worry baby
Everything will turn out alright




Eric's PET Scan was performed the wed before christmas. This was the first scan that was being performed and would really determine how much cancer was in Eric's body. yes we already knew Eric had Colon Cancer that had spread to his liver. And his liver contained multiple tumors (too many to take out in one liver resection). And yes he had already been diagnosed as Stage IVa (Stage IV is as far as this train goes just for a frame of reference, and IVb is the last station you can get off at). But this was going to determine how extensive the damage is OUTSIDE of what we know.

Well needless to say they made us sweat it out over the Holiday weekend. Eric was anxious and thought this was bad news. We had the Pet Scan performed in Princeton, as opposed to Memorial. They told us a preliminary report would be available within 24 hours, and alas it was not. So automatically he took this as bad news. I on the other hand, took into account the holiday...but that's a whole other story....

Anyway back to the PET. On Monday Eric has his systemic chemo treatment, which includes bloodwork and a visit with Dr. Lee. Dr. Lee is a super sweet doc, who really takes the time to talk to his patients. Usually we wait forever, but lucked out because of the blizzard, many people cancelled. Speaking of which, that blizzard really made it a bitch to get to Princeton, but I digress...

So Lee did his normal assessment, and looked at Eric's blood levels. HE platelets are back to normal, and the only negative in the bloodwork, if you could even consider it a negative, is that Eric is SLIGHTLY anemic. But this is to be expected with liver surgery. So he is getting ready to send us to Chemo, and I kindly remind him, "Don't we have PET scan results?" He honestly forgot to tell us. At that point I knew it was good news.

Essentially the scan found that the Cancer is contained to the liver. The lungs, lymphnodes,spine, and other organs were all clear. The only area that "glowed" was an extremely small inflamed area under the armpit. And they honestly think that has to do with Eric's Eczema, and would not be following a natural pattern of disease for Colon Cancer. So they are not too concerned about this area. The tumors also appear to have shrunk slightly, so Chemo is working. We were elated!!!!! And it is a weight off of Eric's shoulders. This gives him yet ANOTHER reason to keep kicking the shit out of this cancer!

The chemo still sucks. HE is starting to really feel the effects of it. HE is extremely sensitive to cold. Cold weather, cold drinks, cold surfaces. HE has to drink room temp liquids, or it feels like hards of glass are ripping apart his throat. He has to wear gloves to open the fridge, he got out of shoveling in the blizzard (although I think that was planned). Eric is having constant pins and needles feelings in his hands. Thats the neuropathy, and it gets worse with every treatment. His spirits are good though. He handles it like a champ! He still has a head full of hair (knock on wood) after 4 chemo treatments. This is Eric at Monday's treatment. He may still lose his hair, and that's ok. I am hoping that while he loses his hair, he will pick up a Scottish or English accent and I can finally bring to reality my fantasies about boinking Sean Connery or PAtrick Stewart. Yes I has a thing for older men who are bald with Accents. They are just so hot! I'm weird I know.

Eric's treatment Progression:








As always, thank you for your continued support and prayers. And remember Keep BELIEVING!!!!!

When you're weary, Feeling small, When tears are in your eyes I will dry them all...

At first I though today's blog would be about the incredible Benefit that the officers and supervisors of the 2nd Dist ran for Eric...and it will be eventually. There is no way I could write an entry and not recognize everything that the men and women of the district did for my husband. But today became a day of unexpected things.

Eric had an appointment to remove the staples from his stomach, and a chemo consult up at Sloan.

So we made the long commute up for what I assumed would be a fairly quick visit with Dr. Kemeny, the oncologist, then Dr. D'Angelica to remove the staples. I figured today we would discuss various Chemo options, and find out when Eric would have to get his Mediport. But after Dr. Kemeny looked at Eric's blood results, and his current state of health, she decided Chemo would start today. She wanted to be as aggressive as possible and break this cancer's face (it's a Halladay reference). This is somewhat bittersweet. Because Eric was supposed to start Chemo on December 15th, we were planning on ...ummm...."banking" after the stitches were removed today. He was in no position to give specimens with stitches in. Well anyone who is familiar with chemo knows that it carries a very high chance of sterilization. So while I watched the the chemo that is going to help Eric beat the cancer go into his vein, a little piece of me crumbled inside. Because with that life saving treatment, out goes my chances of ever having Eric's child.

Eric will be receiving 3 different types of chemo. His pump will distribute FUDR chemo over the course of 2 weeks, and every 2 weeks he will have a systemic treatment of Eloxatin & CPT-11. The systemic treatment takes a little over 2.5 hours from start to finish. He is supposed to feel super nauseous. Our Rx plan only covers some of the pills Eric needs to control this. I guess I should be grateful some of it is covered, because the one Rx is $350 for 2 pills (it's 2 pills a day) and the other is $60 a pill (the insurance company only covered 13 of 25 pills). But hey its something, and its less that I have to spend out of pocket. He will need this EVERY chemo treatment, so it will add up. We are supposed to get systemic in Princeton, but Eric really feels good here. The people are just so nice. Just found out the Chemo Suite is open until 10p, so we might be able to go up here if he really wants to. Whatever he wants I am game.

Being in the city today made me think of Simon and Garfunkel...and "Bridge Over Troubled Waters". The words are powerful. And it made me also think of the benefit, and all the people that rallied around Eric. God it felt so good. I know it made him want to fight even more! He put the following post on facebook (sorry about the profanity)

Eric F Dial: just seeing all the support tonight makes me more determine to fight this shit even harder. Fuck that its gonna take more then @#*($%* ass cancer to beat me. Knowing thats my family is by my side my brothers and sister in blue, long time and new friends I just met tonight I will beat this no problem.

Thank you everyone for helping my husband fight this battle! I promise I will blog more about the benefit soon. Chemo is almost done. So I leave you with a picture and a song...

The Campbells Condensed version of our Journey....

At 34 years old Eric did not expect to be diagnosed with Stage IV Colon Cancer...but here we are. After presenting to the ER on September 29th, 2010 with what they believed was a blood clot in his lung, Eric, an otherwise healthy Police Officer, husband, and father was told that he had colon cancer that had spread to his liver.

We are now in beginning the biggest fight of our lives-to beat cancer. Eric was diagnosed with Stage IV on October 4th, 2010, 5 days shy of our 2nd wedding anniversary. On Oct 6th he had part of his colon removed. He was released Oct 9th to seek further treatment. We chose to seek the medical help of Dr. D'Angelica at Memorial Sloan Kettering in NYC. We went back to Dr. D'Angelica on November 2nd to see if Eric is strong enough to have his liver reresectioned. We also met with Dr. Kemeny, the Medical Oncologist who will be providing the chemo and additional treatments.

Eric's liver surgery is scheduled for November 16, 2010 at Memorial Sloane-Kettering in NYC. During surgery they will removed the tumors, gallbladder, and put in his HAI Chemo Pump (see below). Eric will be hospitalized at least 6 days. I will be staying up there with him. Sadly, unlike Abington, I cannot stay in the room with him overnight. I am looking into Hostels...this could be a lot of fun or I could be kidnapped so people can pay to murder me (remember the movie Hostel...lol), however the AMAZING Police Officer's at the 2nd District, are seeing if they can try to make some come of arrangements for me up there.

After Surgery Eric will have aggressive chemo treatment. He will be doing 2 different types. One is hepatic artery infusion chemotherapy (see ) and the other is traditional systemic chemo. He will be receiving these treatments simultaneously for at least 6 months.


This is going to be a long and difficult journey, but he are going to fight with all we have. Friends and family can support us through prayer.

A benefit is being thrown for Eric on November 27th, 2010 by the 2nd Police District of the Philadelphia Police Department. More info can be found on the FOP webpage:

We are so grateful for the love and support shown by so many. Words cannot even express how touched we are.

Special Thanks to the following:
The Kozlowski,Conklin, Conway, Grace & Dial Families
Philadelphia Police Department
Capt. Michael McCarrick, Sgt. Jay McLain & the Supervisors & Officers of the 2nd Dist
Bullets LEMC
Garda MC
Staff of Juniata Park Academy
Staff of Roosevelt Middle School
Doctors & Nurses at Abington Memorial Hospital
And all of our friends!!!
Without all of you we would never be able to fight this battle!

Eric is the amazing husband of Jeaneane Dial. He is the proud father of Mark Dial, age 14, and step-father of Logan Little, age 9. He is a 12 year veteran of the Philadelphia Police Department currently assigned to the 2nd Police District.